Saturday, March 21, 2015

His Fantasies




His Fantasies

Copyright Deni Wom            2015
Edited by James Friedman




1 - Defining the Problem


Today’s our tenth anniversary. For the most part it’s been a good marriage. Actually, there’s only one major SNAFU. But I can’t bring myself to ask my husband about it. I know I should. I know it’s unhealthy for our relationship to not talk about it.
For the first few years I didn’t really notice his … habit. Maybe I should call it a mannerism. Whatever.
It’s just that, well … he closes his eyes while he is making love to me.
There! I said it! It makes me wonder if I don’t look sexy to him. Or worse, what if he is fantasizing about some other woman. I’ve watched him when we are with other people, and he doesn’t flirt with the other women.
I’m pretty sure he isn’t fantasizing about being with a man too.
When he kisses me he keeps his eyes open. And when he suckles my nipples he watches my face. When he toys with my boobs or bunni he has his eyes open. But as soon as he enters me, his head goes back and his eyes close.
It’s driving me crazy, stark raving mad. I can’t take it any more. It’s getting in the way of our relationship. Maybe I’ll go talk to a therapist about it.


Well, the therapist referred me to a marital relationship counselor. I see him tomorrow.


The counselor smiled when I told him about my problem. “Why can’t you ask him about what is bothering you?”
I am sure I blushed bright red. I felt the heat in my cheeks. I screwed up my courage and, eyes riveted to my lap, admitted, “What if he’s fantasizing about another woman?”
“That would break your heart?”
I nodded.
“Don't you want to know anyway? The sooner you know, the sooner you can start healing the rift, if that is indeed what he’s thinking about, right?”
I nodded.
“Do you ever talk about your fantasies with each other?”
My whole body blushed as I vigorously shook my head.
My embarrassment lasted for a long, long time. I could not bring myself to look at the counselor.
After a few moments of silence he asked, “What makes you so uncomfortable about discussing your sexual fantasies with your husband?”
I didn’t know what to say.
He continued. “Everybody has fantasies. Every body. They improve our sex lives if we share them with each other. They bring us closer together. Many couples discover that they actually share the same fantasies. And, just because you share fantasies, it doesn’t mean you have to act on them. That’s a decision you can arrive at together, while your talking about them.
“For instance, a person that wants to be touched in a certain way, perhaps in a certain place, can actually enjoy sex with their spouse more. Some women who have not yet had an orgasm sometimes start having orgasms when they and their partner acts out their fantasies.
“Do you have orgasms?”
I turned bright red again. I started to cry.
When I got my tears under control, I shook my head. I said, “But it feels good, the making love. It feels good.” My eyes were still riveted on my lap.
He handed me a Kleenex.
I blew my nose, still looking down.
The counselor took a deep breath, “Fantasies are not wrong. Fantasies are something that intrigue us. Some people fantasize about kissing their partners feet. Some fantasize about kissing or licking their partner’s sex organ. Some people fantasize about watching their partner with another lover. Did you know that 60% of women fantasize about being raped? Not hurt, mind you, just forced to have sex with a person that is not their spouse, and that pushes them to do new things.
“So you see, fantasies are not right or wrong. They’re just our thoughts. Once we verbalize them, we can make the decision as to whether we really want to experience them. Or not.”
He was silent for a while. Then he said, “Until you verbalize them, and your spouse verbalizes his, you can’t talk about them, and make a joint decision on whether you want to actually experience them or not.
I realized that I was no longer blushing. In fact, I was now looking at the man’s face.
“I suggest that tonight over dinner you tell your husband that you wish to discuss each other’s fantasies while you make love. Just say exactly that.”
I thought about what he had said. It made sense. I admitted to myself that I no longer wanted to go through the torture of wondering what my husband thought about when we made love.
And an orgasm? I wondered what that would feel like. Could I have one? I was over thirty years old now. It was time to find out. Wasn’t it?




2 – The Conversation


I was so nervous that I burned the soup. Twice.
We sat down to dinner. My poor hubby could tell there was something wrong. But I just couldn’t bring ‘the subject’ up … yet. We ate in silence for the most part. Hubby’s face told me he was hurt. I am usually fairly talkative. OK, talkative. OK, garrulous ….
We watched TV for a while. Not saying anything. Not even sitting close on the couch. And we watched my shows, not hubby’s. Pretty soon he started snoring.
I debated whether I should wake him up when I got up to go to bed. It would mean that I would have to ask him …. OK, CONFRONT him, about his fantasies.
I was in bed before I started to feel really guilty.
I got back up, put my robe on, and traipsed out to the Living Room. I shook hubby. Once wasn’t enough. Finally he snorked and sat up. “What babe?” He looked around groggily, noticed my robe, and asked, “Time to go to bed?”
He followed me back to our Bedroom. I crawled into bed and turned on my side, my back toward his side of the bed.
“What did I fuck up honey? I’m sorry, whatever it was.”
“Nothing.”
He sighed, dropped his clothes on the floor and crawled into bed behind me.
“What are your sexual fantasies?” I blurted out. I was shaking.
“What?” He sat up and looked my way. I could feel his eyes on the back of my head. I stayed silent.
He sat looking at me for a while, then sank back onto his back. “I’m sorry, whatever I did.” His voice sounded so hurt.
It broke through my wall. I turned over to face him. Tentatively I reached out and gently placed my hand on his flaccid member. “What do you think about while you’re pushing in and out of me?”
He tensed. This was not a normal topic of conversation between us.
“Why do you close your eyes while you are doing it with me?” My tears started to flow. My voice trembled.
“Oh god,” he said as he turned over onto his side and put his arms around me. “I’m sorry baby. I’m so sorry. Really sorry.”
I waited. And waited. And waited some more. Finally I said, “Well?” I sounded far harsher than I intended.
He took a deep breath. “Well, ummmmmm. Ummmmmmm.”
He rolled back onto his back. “FUCK!”
He turned his head to look toward me. It was dark, so I can’t imagine he could see me very well. “I’m scared. What if what I say hurts you honey? I would feel terrible!”
I started to ever so softly caress his cock. He loves it when my fingertips slide up and down his penis, barely touching it. He started to get firmer. I grabbed his balls and gripped them hard. “Tell me or I’ll tear your balls off!” I growled. I aggressively smothered his mouth with mine. I squeezed harder.
His cock sprang to rampant hardness.
“So fuck me and tell me exactly what you are thinking while you do it. Or I’ll crunch your nuts.” The edge in my voice surprised me. I sounded like I really meant it. I released his scrotum before I hurt him.
“Oh fuck,” he moaned as he moved over me.
I guided him into me. “Fuck me stud!” I moaned.
“My god baby, you’re wet!”
I was too. He slid to full depth with no resistance.
“Tell me!” I commanded.
He looked at me, fear on his face, but excitement too. “I’m fantasizing that you are fucking John. His big cock is in you and you’re moaning, and really turned on, and really wet, and I can hear your cunt going “SCHLOP SCHLOP SCHLOP as he fucks you really hard. You wrap your legs around him, pulling him in harder against you. You’re moaning … in heaven … really turned on. You say to John, ‘Fuck me you big fucking stallion! Seed me with your big cock! Fill me with your cum! Don't you dare pull out! Cum way up inside me and leave him inside me until you’re soft.’ ”
He came.
He rolled over on his back, gasping. “God I came hard!”
I had never felt quite like I did right then. Even though I had been wet before, I was sopping wet now. And it wasn’t just hubby’s cummies, either. My tummy was roiling. I was breathing hard, gasping. I felt like something had just happened that I didn’t understand. Not even close to understanding. And oh my god did I feel roiled up and needy!
Then I thought about something that might work. “Who else do you fantasize about doing me?” I put my hand back on his sopping wet, sticky cock. I started caressing his testicles, even letting my fingers stray to his anus.
“Oh god baby!” He began to harden again.
“Who, baby?” I urged. “Tell me about him fucking your wife.”
That was enough. He rolled back over the top of me and plunged in again. He started bucking, his cock rigid as a fence post.
His eyes bored into mine. “There’s five men standing around the bed, all of them naked and stroking themselves as Jamal climbs onto you and sticks his thick black cock inside your wet sloppy cunt. He grips your tits and squeezes them as he fucks you hard, slamming his prick deep into you over and over and over. He leans down and starts to kiss you. He sticks his tongue down your throat as he growls, “Gonna fuck you full a my cum, white girl! Gonna fill you up with my nigga cum. Gonna seed you deep and full. Gonna breed you. Gonna fill yer womb with nigga seed.”
Hubby growled loudly as he came again. “UNNH … UNNNH … UUUUNNNNNHHHHH!” Then he collapsed onto his back.
‘Damn it!’ I thought. I was so randy! I hadn’t felt like this since I was a naïve shy 15 year old! I will never get to sleep. Without even thinking I crawled up on top of my husband and tried to smother him with my freshly double-filled bunni.
Thank god he took the hint and began to suckle on my sticky labia and clitoris. I could feel his cummies running out of me and onto his face.
I don’t know exactly what happened after that, but I felt like I was starting to float toward the ceiling, his tongue following me as I rose, and rose. I remember screaming ….




3 – Post Coital Cuddling


Hubby’s arms were wrapped around me when I woke up. I could feel his erection against the back of my leg.
 Then I remembered the feelings I had the night before. ‘So that’s what an orgasm feels like,’ I thought as I snuggled back against him. ‘Incredible! WOW! I want more of those!’ My lusty grin spread from cheek to cheek.
Hubby’s erection was pulsing.
I started wondering what he would taste like. It had been years since my face was even close to it.
He groaned as he turned over and rolled out of bed, then hobbled toward the bathroom. There was a brief pause while he waited for his erection to soften so he could pee. Then I heard the splatter of his welcome relief. He groaned. Then the telltale sound of droplets hitting the surface of the water as he milked it down and shook it dry. I had watched him do this so many, many times, but never before had it sounded erotic.
‘Can an orgasm really change a person?’ My body felt relaxed, but … vigilant. I felt like smiling. I felt like having another orgasm. My god what a wonderful sensation!
My tummy felt like it was full of butterflies. And caterpillars. I rolled onto my back and kicked the covers off. I spread my thighs as wide as they would go. I reached down to her, caressed her gently as I watched hubby walk back into the bedroom. “Hey stud, tell me more of your fantasies.”
Hubby’s mouth dropped open. He stared at my bunni, and my hand toying with it. He had never seen me do anything remotely like this. I know because I had never done anything like this before.
“GAWWW!” he said, then took two huge strides and lunged onto me. His mouth captured my labia as his tongue plunged into me. He fed on my wetness and his own sperm for a few moments, then moved up over me. He looked into my eyes, love beaming at me. “OK, so … I got up and went into the guest bedroom to say ‘Hi’ to my buddy that is staying with us. There you are, naked, on top of him, riding his prick like a cowgirl princess at a rodeo. You didn’t even look back at me as he slapped your titties and pulled your nipples. He is slamming into you from below as your hips move forward and backward. Your back is arched and your titties stuck out for him to enjoy. ‘Slap, slap, slap’ I hear as he spanks your titties. I hear you murmur, ‘Cum in my cunt! Cum deep in my cunt. Sperm me, make a baby in me. Shoot all of your cums up inside my randy cunt, you big stud!’ ”
Hubby came. But instead of dropping off of me, he moves down, his mouth devouring his mess. He pushes my knees up to my shoulders and digs his tongue as deeply into me as it will go. He laps inside me, and then downward over my anus. His face moves back and forth, up and down, as he laps, lingually penetrates my openings, with deep rumbling moans.
I twisted around and took his penis in my hand. I stuck my tongue out and tasted it. It smelled like sex. I moved the head into my mouth and suckled lightly. He started moving his hips forward and back. Each thrust pressed it further into my mouth. It tasted salty. My nose drew closer and closer to his testicles. I could smell his sperm-like pheromonal scent. I inhaled deeply. I swallowed. The head of his cock slid magically into my throat. I had no clue that it was that easy.
“Oh my god I love it when you act like a slut, baby! That feels so damned good! Oh my god! My wife is sucking my buddy’s cock, taking it down her throat, deep throating him while I watch her. He’s sticking his fingers up her cunt.”
Hubby did, first one finger, then adding another. Then a third. “My wife seems to love my buddy’s prick as she spreads her legs and moans. She humps his hand. He adds another finger, pressing his hand into her further and further.”
Hubby slid his hand, four fingers stretching me wide, further and further into me. I can feel his knuckles begin to press against me. My bunni is screaming, partly from the gentle pain, but also because it is just so damned erotic to feel my body being dominated and abused like this.
‘Why haven’t we done this before?’ I ask myself. I know the answer. I would never let him try it. But oh my god does it feel good. The sensations of my wet, randy bunni being stretched, being made larger, being made slutty by his fantasy of his buddy doing it to me.
I feel that new sensation of rippling inside me, of rising, of floating, of getting short of breath . . . . . . . . . and then my explosion!
I hear a splattering sound, but I am too turned on to pay it any mind, as I explode into ecstasy.
Everything gets dark.
Then I don’t remember anything.




4 – Reconciliation


Hubby is looking down at me from a few inches away when I wake up. “You squirted honey! I can’t believe it! You actually squirted wet stuff out of your pussy when you came! It was incredible!”
I tilt my head up and kiss him. “How long have I been out?”
He glances at the clock. “Maybe fifteen minutes? Or so.”
“I passed out from cumming so hard. I’ve never even heard of that before. Do you ever pass out from coming so hard?” I caress his cheek.
He shakes his head. “I think that’s a female thing. Never heard of a man doing it.”
We are silent for a while. I feel tears gathering in my eyes.
“What’s the matter honey? Why are you tearing up?”
I sniffle. “All this time I thought you were fantasizing about some other woman when we make love,” I sob.
He looks so hurt. “Oh god baby, I would never go out on you! I never have and I never will!”
I place my palms on both of his cheeks. “Even if I asked you to? You know, with a friend of mine?”
He looks startled. “Why would you want me to do that?”
I sniffle again. “I don’t know. It just feels unfair for you to have all these fantasies of my needs getting met, and you just get to watch me with other men.”
His eyes widen. “Are you saying we would do this for real? Actually have other men fuck you?”
I shrug, my eyes going out of focus as I think about what that might be like. “It’s your fantasy, right, to see it happen? Would YOU like to have it happen in real life?”
I feel his penis stiffen into hardness.
He growls. He kisses me hard. He mounts me, plunging deep into me. His thrusts are frantic, like he had to spurt or go crazy. His mouth devours mine, his tongue delving deep into my open mouth. His tongue caresses my tongue. I feel his previously deposited sperm pumping out of me and down over my anus.
He pumps me hard like that for a long time. Finally, gasping for breath, he slows down. “I’ve cum so much that I don’t think I can cum again!” He laughs. “It’s your turn to get on top and fuck me like you want to. Whatever turns you on, honey.”
He rolls me over, never losing his penetration.
I sit up straight above him, looking down at the man that I suddenly realize I didn’t know until last night.
I remember reading a story, I guess I would call it a sex advice column, on a sexy art webpage. The name Samarel comes to mind. A woman had described how the sex advice woman had learned to flex her pelvic muscles in such a way that it drives the men in her life crazy when they make love. I decide to give it a try.
I focus on my inner core. I flex the muscles that I use to try and start my urine flow.
My husband’s eyes widen.
Then I flex the muscles that I use to try and push … how do I say it … poop … out.
My husband moans.
I alternate between the two muscle sets as I flex my tummy forward and back. I can feel my husband’s rigid penis slap me inside when I do it forcefully. OH MY GOD it feels good!
My husband’s eyes are staring at me with intensity. “Oh god baby, that feels so dammed good!”
I begin to scooch my hips lower as I move onto his penis, then higher as my hips move away. It feels incredible! I keep making all of my internal muscle flexes as I begin to rise, slowly climbing toward my very first self-induced orgasm.
Hubby’s body goes rigid, arcing upward with his head and shoulders. His cock suddenly pulses, then squirts hot liquid hard, deep inside me.
It’s enough to push me over the edge into exquisite oblivion.




5 – Building Fantasies


My husband brought me flowers the next day. He knelt in front of me and grinned up at me. “Darling, I love you more than I can find words to voice. I didn’t realize until yesterday that you were hurting from my actions. I was fantasizing about one thing, and I should have voiced my fantasy, baby. I should have made sure that I wasn’t hurting you. But I didn’t. And I apologize from the bottom of my heart for that. Please forgive me.
“But sweetheart, when you said that you might consider letting me actually watch you enjoying other men! OH MY GOD!” He giggled self-consciously. “I’m getting hard just thinking about it!”
I looked at him, more in love at that moment than I had been on the day we got married. He truly was a loving, highly dedicated husband!
He was still staring into my eyes. I could tell that he wanted to talk about something. “What baby?” I asked.
He cleared his throat. “Um ….” He blushed bright red. “Um ….”
“Just say it baby,” I urged.
He nodded, looking out the window.
Then he turned back to look at me. “We need to do this carefully, honey. I would not be able to live with myself if I somehow caused you problems.”
“Like what, honey?” I asked.
“I don’t know … like you catching a sexually transmitted disease. Or getting hurt by one of your lovers. Or people you don’t want to know about this finding out, and maybe spreading rumors …. That sort of thing.”
I nodded, processing the things he had said. He was right. Every one of those things are something that we had to be careful about.
We were quiet for a while. It wasn’t until we were in bed that night that we broached the subject again.
My husband propped himself upon his elbow, his blue eyes staring at me. “God you’re gorgeous baby.” He kissed me softly on my forehead. “What if we were to have one of my most trusted friends come over for an evening for our first time? We could pay for his STD testing, and make sure he won’t tell anyone.”
I thought about his friends. Only one of them was single. I knew most of his friends’ wives. There was no way I could face them if I had had sex with their husband. I’m just not that type of person.
“Who are you thinking of talking to?” I finally ask.
“I don’t think you know him. He’s single, good-looking, athletic, trust worthy. Why don’t I talk to him and, if he agrees, we can go out to dinner with him. What do you think?”
“OK,” I say, feeling warmth spreading in my tummy. “Want to fuck me, honey?” I ask. “Want to fuck me like I’m a slutty little cheating white wife?”
He moans as he moves over me, kissing me as his hand gropes my breast.
“Pull my nipple baby!” I moan. “Slap my tittie. Fuck me hard and deep! Do me like a wanton slut.”
His cock is hard as steel as I guide him into me. His fingers pull and twist my nipple as he calls me ‘fucking slut.’ He slams full depth into me over and over and over. I wrap my legs around him as I moan, “Fuck your slutty little wife, teach her a lesson on how to properly treat your friends honey. Teach her what she needs to know to satisfy all your buddies. So they will tell you that your fucking wife is the best fuck they’ve ever laid!”

Gasping for air, I explode in brilliant, arching skyrockets, and bursting explosions of delight.

Thursday, March 19, 2015





The Twins
Copyright Deni Wom
Edited by James Friedman





Chapter 1 - The Clearing


Dani: 7th Grade; Tony: 5th Grade

“Hey.”
“Hey.”
They watched as a flock of Canadian geese honked their way across the sky, aligning their flight path to glide onto the surface of the lake.
Without turning to look at her, the boy asked, “Can I stay here tonight?” He seemed nervous.
The girl turned her head slightly, trying to study him out of the corner of her eye. She wondered if he knew, despite her boyish clothing and very short hair, she was a girl. She glanced around the clearing. Not a great place, but it did seem to blunt the wind, even helped a bit with the cold.
He was young, probably too young to have raping her in mind. Whatever raping was. Couldn’t be worse than what she had already been through with her stepfather.
She shrugged. “Got a sleeping bag?”
“Naw. Don’t need a sleeping bag. I got a blanket.”
“Suit yourself.”
They gathered some wood, then lit a fire as the sun sank below the horizon. They bantered back and forth for a while, then withdrew to opposite sides of the clearing to sleep.
Sometime in the night she heard his teeth chattering. The wind had come up and the temperature seemed to have dropped precipitously. The fire was out. No moon.
She listened.
The kid was crying. Not loud, just soft whimpers and sniffles. He sounded scared. He sounded lonely. He sounded as if his heart was broken.
She made her decision. “Bring your blanket over here and put it on top of my sleeping bag. We’ll both be warmer,” she said. Just in case he came over, she unzipped her sleeping bag a bit to let him in.
It took him a few moments, but the cold overcame his sense of pride. She was shocked by how cold he was when he finally climbed in beside her. With the compassion of an older sibling, she rolled over and put her arm around his thin frame, pulling him to her. It took a while, but his shivering slowly subsided. She had almost drifted back to sleep when he started whimpering again.
His soul seemed to pour from his clenched teeth. He cried for a long time.
“What happened?” she finally asked when he quieted.
He shook his head, unwilling to verbalize the horrible things that had been done.
She thought before deciding to tell him the reason that she had run away from home, of the unspeakable things her stepfather had tried to do to her.
When she started talking, she could tell he was listening intently. When she was done, he sniffled. “How’d you stop him?”
She described how her knee had caught him in his unprotected groin, how her fingers had dug out one of his eyes, how her forehead had knocked him out.
He thought for a while. Finally he said, “Wish I could’ve done that.”
“I’ll show you,” she offered.
He groaned when he shifted. “My butt is soooo sore; it bleeds when I go.”
He still didn’t seem to suspect she was a girl. “I’ll take you to the ER in awhile, After the sun comes up, when it warms up a little.”
He snuggled a little closer. “Would you be my sister?” he asked, almost too softly for her to hear.
So he did know. She sifted through her fears and reservations. “OK,” she finally said.
“My name’s Tony. What’s yours?”
Dani.”




Chapter 2 – Emergency Room


After the sun came up

“Let’s clean up before we go to the emergency room, Tony.”
“You mean bathe in the creek?” Tony sounded skeptical, even slightly frightened by the idea.
“The lake, actually. It’s warmer.”
Tony still didn’t look so sure. “Am I going to be naked? In front of you?”
Dani chuckled. “I’m your big sister, remember? We’ve seen each other naked lots of times.”
Tony looked a little squeamish. “Never had anyone see me naked … ’cept ….” Tears glimmered as he stifled a sob.
“If we’re going to live like brother and sister, here, we’re going to have to get used to bathing together. I have no intention of being dirty just because I’m homeless.”
Tony could see the logic in that. He shrugged and walked, gingerly, toward the lake.


It took them two hours to walk to the emergency room. Walking obviously caused Tony pain. Once there, it took another hour and a half to see a nurse. After an half hour of explanations in which Tony swore that Dani was his big sister, and that they had no other family alive, they were placed in a curtained off area.
Tony was instructed to take his clothes off and put on a backless paper gown.
An hour later a doctor examined Tony. To Tony’s humiliation, another nurse was present for the examination. Dani could tell by the expression on the nurse’s face that she was deeply moved by the trauma the boy had suffered.
As they left the ER, the nurse followed them out. She asked Dani if she could talk with her for a moment.
Though mortified, Dani decided to come clean with the nurse. Staring at the floor, she explained their situation, about her stepfather, about Tony’s traumatic molestation.
Tears in her eyes, the nurse watched her. “We have a little bedroom that is off the back of our house that you two are welcome to use, if you want to. There is a laundry room and bathroom with a shower right by it too, which you could use. What do you think?”
Dani looked into the nurse’s compassionate eyes. “How would we pay for it? We have no money.”
The nurse thought for a moment, then nodded. “I understand what you are saying. My husband and I have several acres, and we raise a few sheep and chickens. How about if you two do the yard work and take care of the animals and mow the fields in exchange for both food and shelter? I’m Henrietta by the way. My husband calls me Eta.”
Dani promised to talk to Tony about her kind offer and get back to her. Eta gave Dani a card with her address, and work and home phone number. “Just show up if you want to use it. Things are crazy here in the afternoon; I may not be able come to the phone. So if you decide to call, leave a message if I’m tied up. Okay?” She seemed to struggle with whether she could give Dani a hug.


After Tony was released from the ER, Dani and Tony walked the two miles to the address the nurse had given them. It was a pretty house, with a huge yard and even larger fields. They counted ten sheep and at least fifty chickens. The house was only a few blocks from Tony’s school.
A man watched them through the living room window. He watched them looking at the house. After a few moments he came out. “I’m Ralph. I’m Henrietta’s husband. She called and told me a little bit about your conversation. Would you like me to show you the room?”
Dani and Tony looked at each, eyes sparkling, not quite believing how lucky they were, and nodded.
The room was large, had twin beds, two desks, and a TV. The entry to the room was off the back porch.
“Our two sons used to live in here before they went off to college and got hitched. It’s been empty ever since. What do you think?”
Dani rushed to the man and hugged him. Tony waited for a few seconds, then hobbled over to him and hugged him as well.
“It’s going to be great to have this room used again.” Ralph said with a wistful grin. “Now let me show you how we feed the sheep and chickens. We collect eggs every evening. Come on, I’ll show you.”


Later that night Dani heard whimpers. Tony was crying again. She lay there for a few seconds, debating, then proposed that they push the single beds close together so that they could snuggle if he needed to.
Tony quieted. A few moments later he murmured. “I’m sorry.”
“For what, little brother?”
His whimpers escalated to outright crying. When his sobs subsided a little he gasped, “How come you’re so nice to me? You’re white, I’m black.”
Dani was surprised. She puzzled the question. Why would he think that made a difference to her? Then it dawned on her. It made a difference to him. “Tell me why you think that makes a difference, little brother.”
As he thought about her question, his crying lessened, then turned to sniffles. “I dunno. Cuz everybody says it does, I guess.”
The room became silent, except for their breathing.
Dani asked, “Why do you say you’re black? I don’t understand that sort of thing. People have one parent that’s Caucasian, and one parent that has some African heritage, and invariably they call themselves black. They have less ‘black’ in them than they do ‘white;’ yet they automatically think of themselves as being black. Why is that? It makes no sense.”
After a few more moments of silence, Tony said. “I dunno. It’s just what I been told. All my life I been told I’m black.”
The silence lengthened. Dani thought that perhaps Tony had gone to sleep.
Then, his voice barely audible, he added, “Thinkin’ ‘bout it, I guess I don’t wanna be called no uppity nigger.”
Dani bolted upright in bed. She was shocked. She had never heard anyone actually use that word before. The ‘N Word’. To actually say it out loud was considered the ultimate in crass. She felt shamed just to hear the word.
She found her indignation rising. Trying not to sound angry, she replied, “Little brother, since you ARE my brother … now … I forbid you from thinking of yourself in such a horrible way. You are my brother, and you are intelligent and loving and kind and thoughtful and ….” She ran out of words. “And I forbid you to say … or even THINK … such awful things about yourself.
“You can be anything you want to be in this world. The only person that can stop you from succeeding is you. One of the things that can stop you is thinking of yourself as less than other people because of something you have no control over, such as your heritage. Make your friends see you for who you really are. Excel in anything you do. Like Yoda said, ‘Don't try, DO!’ ”
The room was silent again for a bit.
“And, little brother, if I ever hear you put yourself down like that again, I’m going to give you noogies. We’ve both had horrible things happen to us, but it isn’t our fault. It was some SOB that did it us. We didn’t deserve it. And I’ll be damned if I am going to let it hold me down. Now let’s shove these beds together so we can both feel like we belong to someone, and go to sleep.”
They wrestled the beds from the sides of the room to the center, leaving the sheets and covers to hang down between the beds, tacitly signifying that there was a definite boundary between them, a mutual agreement that they were not physically intimate.
They got back into bed, still wearing their clothes, yet another indication that they were indeed brother and sister.
Dani grinned at Tony’s shy smile. She turned out the light.
Tony wriggled back against the barrier of the covers. “Would you put your arm around me until I can get to sleep … please?”
Dani did so, her mind sifting through the things she needed to say to her young friend. She took a deep breath, then opened up her heart. “Look, Tony, I’m a girl. I could use that as a way of feeling like a victim. Just like you are using your race to play the part of a victim. It’s bullshit. I can be anything I want to be so long as I don’t play the part of a victim. On top of being a girl, I am also sort of good looking. The bastards that want to control me will use both against me. If I were ugly, they would use that against me.
“I won’t let them. No way. I will be me, and I will accomplish the things I want to accomplish. I will not let my family, or friends, or enemies, or anybody else deflect me from the destiny that I want for my life.
“I’m just starting to get boobs. I’ve watched other women allow themselves to get side tracked by their femininity. Or their looks. Or their gender. I will not. I know what I want and I am going to get it, despite any roadblock that I come up against.
“And that’s what you need to do too. Decide what you want out of life, and go for it. Don't let drugs or smoking or assholes or manipulators get in your way.
“Forget that other people see you only as a black male in America at a time when they think they can manipulate you with that. Be you. Be ALL you want to be.”
Dani was silent for a moment or two. “Or I’ll find you and give you noogies. Understand?”
He giggled. Then, silence again, until Tony asked, “What’s your goal in life?”
Without hesitation, Dani said, “I am going to be the best soccer player in the world.”


Two Weeks Later

They had the chickens fed, the cows hayed, and their clothes washed. “Wanna play some soccer?” Tony asked.
“You feel up to it?” Dani said as she looked at him.
Tony shrugged. “Won’t know for sure till I try.” He kicked the ball to her.
Dani deftly trapped the ball, shuffled it perfectly to her other foot and passed the ball back.
They passed the ball back and forth for several minutes before Ralph came out of the house. He stood on the back porch, watching,  then walked down to where they were scrimmaging. Without asking, he joined in. It was immediately apparent that he had some skills when it came to soccer. Before long they were laughing as they played, Dani and Tony against Ralph.
An hour later, breathing hard, the sun fully set, Ralph asked, “You kids want some hot chocolate?”
“WOW! This is good!” Tony said when he took a sip.
Dani grinned. “It is, isn’t it? Thank you, Ralph.”
Tony’s face seemed to cloud before he perked up and said, “Thanks!”
Ralph said, “I used to coach my kids soccer team when they were growing up.”
Tony looked at Dani. “Dani is going to be the best soccer player in the world,” he stated.
Ralph looked at Dani. “That right?”
Dani blushed, but then sat up straighter. “Yes. It is.”
Ralph nodded. “Well then, young lady, it would be my pleasure to assist you on your journey.”



Chapter 3 - Dojo


A Year Later
Dani: 8th Grade; Tony: 6th Grade

Dani came out of the grocery store with her arms full of grocery bags. She saw Tony down the street, staring through a window. She walked to him, and handed him two of the grocery bags. He took them without looking at her, his eyes riveted on what was happening inside the window.
Dani looked through the window too. People seemed to be dancing with each other in a very forceful way. As she watched, one of each the dance partners stepped in close, put their hip against their partner’s hip, then threw them to the floor.
Tony said, “Judo. Don't you think?”
“Kind of graceful, isn’t it?”
Each of the partners turned to the other and bowed. They then turned as a group and bowed to a man at the front of the room. The man bowed back.
Everyone went to the coat closet and prepared to leave.
Tony and Dani were just walking down the street toward home when someone behind them called to them. They turned to see the man that everybody had bowed to a few moments earlier. He motioned for them to walk back to him.
Feeling as if they had been caught cheating at something, they did so.
“Are you kids interested in learning self defense?” the man asked.
Tony nodded furiously. “Yes sir.”
Dani looked at Tony. She saw his look of determination. She thought about what he had said the night they first met. She looked at the man. “We have no way to pay you sir, but we would be happy to clean your place once a week if we could learn from you.”
The man stared at her, then at Tony. Then his lips curled ever so slightly into the tiniest of smiles. “This ‘place’ is called a Dojo. I am Sensei Mac. Sensei means teacher, or instructor. And I accept your offer. Please come inside for a few moments. I will show you where the janitor’s closet is and what you will need to clean every week. He turned on the ball of his foot and went back inside the Dojo.

2 Weeks Later
As they had started doing every night, on Ralph’s the suggestion, Tony and Dani were passing the ball back and forth between them as they watched TV. Dani flipped the ball upward to her head, then gently headed it back to her right foot, where she caught it on the top of her shoe. She then passed it back to Tony.
A commercial came on.
Tony turned to face Dani. His face was shining with happiness. “I’ve decided what I’m going to be when I grow up.” His dark eyes sparkled as he grinned.
Dani smiled back at him. “Great! What?”
“I’m going to be a medical doctor like Sensei Mac, and be the best martial arts fighter in the world.” He stood, then turned to face her, holding his fists and arms exactly the way that Sensei Mac had taught them. With consummate grace he kicked then punched with both fists, twisting his hands as they shot forward, exactly the way that they had been taught.
Dani gathered her little brother into her arms. She kissed his forehead then said, “There’s no doubt in my mind that you will be exactly that.”


A Week Later
Dani laughed; a deep belly laugh, the kind that make your eyes water. Tony couldn’t stop himself from joining in.
They had been passing the soccer ball back and forth between them, using only their feet. Over the time they had been roommates, brother and sister, they had used the soccer ball to hone their attention on what they were working on, like homework. They could now study or watch TV, or even walk down the street as they passed the ball back and forth. Both of them could pop the ball up, dribble it in the air with their feet, then pass it off to the other person, without even looking at the ball.
Tony had passed the ball to Dani using his forehead to tip the ball her way. The ball had landed smack dab in her lap, wedged between her flat belly and the front of the desk. When she scooted her chair back slightly to free the ball, the chair legs moving on the floor had made the sort of sound that is best contained in the restroom.
They knew each other well enough by now that they felt able to pass gas in each other’s presence. They could even discussed the flavor of the odor when they were particularly bored.
But the sound of chair legs scraping on the floor resounded so loudly in the room that they could not help themselves. They laughed until they had tears in their eyes.
All the while, they kept the soccer ball moving between them, tipping it up. Passing it foot to foot, catching it between their feet or knees, tipping it up to bounce on their foreheads as they laughed.
Tony finally calmed down enough to comment, “You know sis, we are getting really good at controlling the ball. I bet you could use your ball control to get by the opposing players when you need to pass them on the field.
Dani visualized how that might be beneficial for a few moments, then grinned. “Good idea, lil bro. I’ll think about that, try it in my next game.”

Chapter 4 - Soccer


A Years Later
Dani: 9th Grade; Tony: 8th Grade

The Cowgirls soccer team was behind 4-zip, the first string players bitching constantly about the heat. When coach had enough of their attitude, she turned to her bench and pointed at Dani. “Yer in! I don’t want to hear a word about the heat! Just go in there and play your heart out. That’s all I ask of you.”
The Cowgirls won the game 5-4. Dani scored all five points.
Tony was jubilant as he picked his sister up and swung her around. “Sis, you are incredible!” He looked down at her flushed face. He was a full foot taller than she was now. “I can’t believe how you can dribble around the other players like that! And that last goal! MY GOD! You put that ball right in the upper right corner of the goal! Perfect! No way a goalie could ever reach that!”
Dani hugged her little brother tight. Her arms were wrapped tightly around his waist. She pressed her cheek against his chest. “Thanks lil bro.”
Most of the first string quit when she was named to first-string starter at center that next week. The rumor mill went wild about how Dani was the bed-buddy of the coach, who was suddenly rumored to be a dyke. It was the only thing that could possibly explain why such a young player could be promoted to 1st string, after all.
After all, Dani was only a Freshman! Good god! Besides, with a bod like hers, why did she even play sports? She could have any guy she wanted, why be an athlete? The innuendoes grew nastier every day.
The Cowgirls won their next game, 9-0. Dani scored every point. A triple hat trick! Unheard of! Coach had promoted a number of other players that showed promise, and good attitude. Having a team that actually played as a team really helped, of course.
The School Board began receiving complaints from the well-to-do parents of the girls that were no longer first string, each complaint including a reference to the dyke coach that moved such young players onto first string.
During the next School Board meeting, one of the School Board members asked what soccer was; several members of the other Board just shrugged in reply, confused.
One of the parents complained vociferously about the coach being a dyke.
The Board seemed to be unfamiliar with that term as well.
Coach let her husband of 18 years speak for her on the subject.
The Board chairwoman, not wanting to give further credence to the rumors, tabled the discussion until the next regular Board meeting.
The Cowgirls won their next three games, Dani scoring every point.
Recall petitions were brought to the ensuing Board meeting. An election of School Board members was duly scheduled for the next regular countywide election.
The reconstituted Cowgirls team, with Dani’s fervid encouragement, gained both experience and a desire to score. The new players carried no sense of entitlement. As they their teamwork, others on the team began to score as well.
The Cowgirls won their last regular season game, 14-2. They arrived at the State Soccer Tournament seeded #7 out of 14 teams.
They did well at the State tourney, taking first place, outscoring their opponents 2 to 1.
The following week, Dani received a scholarship offer from a prestigious all-girls high school in a neighboring county. This season had been the first season that the nearby school’s girl’s soccer team had not taken first place in the tri-county tournament.
Of course the crap hit the fan locally as those people that considered themselves to be the “in crowd” branded Dani as a traitor and a turncoat. Those casting aspersions were, of course, the same people that had been criticizing her earlier in the year, still branding her a lesbian, unworthy of her place on the team, the coach’s pet, etc.
Ralph and Eta were excited for “their kids”. Over breakfast they gently steered Dani into accepting the scholarship, reassuring Tony that he could continue on at his school. He would, after all, be able to still see Dani every night when she came home. That summer Ralph fixed up an old, dark blue Jeep that he had bought several years before. Dani and Tony helped him with the repairs and repainting.
Both Dani and Tony earned their brown belts at the Dojo that summer.


Dani loved her time at the all-girl’s school, graduating with both academic and athletic honors, first in her graduating class against worthy scholastic competition.
Despite her perfect grades and hard work on her studies, she played soccer every year, becoming the team leader and lead scorer. The girl’s high school took state every year, further riling the miffed parents of the Cowgirls soccer team. They were especially caustic when the prestigious girl’s school beat the Cowgirls 17-0.
Dani was offered full-ride four-year academic/athletic scholarships to several universities of her choice. She chose the college that had the best women’s soccer team, expecting the coach to be exceptional, and that her teammates would give her plenty of competition.
Tony was already a 2nd degree black belt; Dani was 1st degree black belt.
Tony entered his senior year one year ahead of his previous classmates. His grades put him at the pinnacle of his class.

Dani had still not gone on a date when she entered college. She had not kissed a single boy, nor even held hands. It wasn’t that she didn’t want to. She did want to. It was just that whenever a boy came toward her, his eyes would rivet onto the heavenly vision of her Twins. The boy would invariable become tongue-tied, unable to speak.
Once she had even tried asking a boy to join her for a burger after class, but as usual the young man could not answer. He never did look at her face.
Humiliated, she didn’t ask again.

Dani made a point of coming home from college (a three hour drive each way) at least every other weekend. The Jeep was perfect for winter weather driving over the pass. While home, she and Tony compared their experiences, enjoying each other’s company more and more each visit.
When Dani came home for Spring Break, Ralph had facial bruises. “What happened, Pops? Are you OK?”
Ralph grinned. “Let your brother tell you about it.” He went back to reading his paper.
Dani turned to look at Eta, her eyebrows raised in question.
Eta chuckled. “We had some excitement. Your brother was the hero.” She pointed at the back porch as she tilted her head in that direction.
Dani set her suitcase down and headed out to talk with her brother, a bad feeling in the pit of her stomach. “What happened to Pops?” she demanded as she walked through the door to their room.
Tony glanced up at her as he set his pen down. “Promise you won’t get mad at me, Sis?”
The sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach became a massive weight. “You did that?”
Tony shook his head as he pointed at her perfectly made bed. “Sit down so we can talk. I really need to get this off my chest. I need your absolution and guidance, Sis.”
Dani sat down, her face full of worry. “Talk to me lil bro.”
Tony laid on his back. “Well, we were coming back from the State Aikido Tournament. I was flat worn out. You know, the adrenaline let-down after a big match. So I crawled into the back seat and laid down. It was after dark. I fell a sleep.
“You know how it is, when the car stops you sort of wake up? Well, I felt the car stop and figured that Pops was stopping for gas, or to take a leak or something. I didn’t sit up, just tried to go back to sleep. But something in my chest told me this was not a routine stop. I sat up and looked out the window. There was like a biker gang or something outside the car. Some big burly dude yanked Pops’ door open and pulled him out of the car. He was using the “F” word and being really abusive. Told him he needed the “F’n” car more than Pops did. Moms was Screaming in terror.
“By the time I got my seat belt off and out of the car, he had hit Pops several times in the face and stomach. Pops was down on the ground, bleeding. So I knocked the biker dude out. One strike. Four others came at me. I knocked them out too. One punch each. The rest of the gang jumped back on their bikes and took off.
“Mom called the cops. Of course they didn’t believe me when I told them what happened. Mom went to the hospital with Pops in the ambulance, leaving me there with the car. They handcuffed me and put me in the back seat of the cop car. After three hours of BS, they let me out again.
“The biker dudes had to be taken to the hospital by ambulance too. One of them, the guy that was beating on Pops, is now blind, apparently.”
Tony looked at Dani. “Did I do the wrong thing, Sis? I mean, holy crap, five big biker dudes with at least ten more backing them up. I was scared! I mean REALLY scared. I just reacted.” He sat there, his head hanging down. “Anyway ….”
Dani moved over beside him. She put her arm around his shoulders. “Sounds to me like you did exactly the right thing, little brother. As we’ve discussed before, some people are bullies. They think they can bully anyone. They tried to bully the wrong person this time. They didn’t expect a kid to be as good as you are. They gambled. They lost, big time.
“But I heard you say, ‘Of course, the cops didn’t believe you.’ That’s victim thinking. The cops arrived on site, saw a high school kid had beat up four bikers and jumped to the assumption that was highly unlikely. They acted rationally. They had no idea that you’re the super man that you are. They know now. And the bikers will think twice before they try to steal a car from some old folks next time. I think you did great. I’m mighty proud of you! Good job, little brother! You’ve done incredibly well in your martial arts. Obviously you learned well. You have now applied your knowledge and training in the real world, and can be justifiably proud of saving Pops’ life, and probably Eta’s too. You dun good, kid! Damn good!”
Tony stared at Dani’s face, seeming to have a hard time believing her. “Really?” Tears welled up in his eyes.
Dani pulled him to her, giving him a tight hug. She kissed his head. “Damn straight I’m proud of you, Bro!”



Chapter 5 – Tony’s Graduation


Three Years Later
Dani: College Freshman; Tony: 12th Grade

Tony bowed to his opponent, his right fist pressed to his left palm. He then turned and faced the judges, which included his Sensei. He bowed, showing his reverence for their advanced knowledge and skills.
Sensei Mac and the other judges returned his bow. When they stood upright, Sensei Mac grinned broadly. “Congratulations, Tony. Your Kata was perfect. You meet the requirements for 6th Dan.”
Dani, Eta and Ralph clapped loudly, cheering enthusiastically.
Dani was impressed, and excited. Her little brother was progressing through the Dans much faster than normal. His ability to teach younger martial artists exceeded even that of Sensei Mac. Dr. Mac had reverently told her that he had never seen a more promising martial artist.
And tomorrow the tall, handsome young man would graduate from high school as valedictorian. His grade point average was a perfect 4.5, almost unheard of nationwide.
The next morning, Eta and Dani fussed with his graduation gown and hat. Tony chuckled at how much they wanted him to look perfect.
“Oh my goodness!  You are the most handsome young man I ever did see!” Eta exclaimed several times. Her eyes teared up as she thought about their little room being empty again when Tony went off to college. “I shall miss you two every single day.”
Tony had received a full-ride scholarship to the university of his choice. He was almost guaranteed entrance to a prestigious medical school if he did as well in college as he had done in high school. And there was a highly respected Dojo just off campus. Sensei Mac had introduced him to the 9th Dan Sensei that ran the Dojo. Tony had liked the man immediately.
The two of them had sparred for a short while. Tony was impressed with his skills. Sensei Goro was equally impressed with Tony’s abilities.
When he could stand no more of his sister and mother’s fussiness, he fled to the protection of his classmates.
Ralph had saved seats in the third row of the audience section. Eta kept saying, “He’s so handsome!”
Dani had to agree. Her brother was tall, well groomed, had a gorgeous smile, and eyes that watched her face while she spoke. It was so refreshing to have a male’s eyes staring at something besides her twins.
The band started playing ‘Pomp and Circumstance.’ The line of graduating seniors shuffled down the aisle to their seats. Tony led the procession, his eyes straight ahead, an amused expression on his face.
When he passed Dani, he looked at her and winked. He mouthed, ‘Thank you sis!’
When introduced, Tony rose to speak.
Dani started to record his speech on her cellphone.
Tony looked straight at Dani, then Eta, then Ralph. “I have been blessed in my life by a sister, a mother, and a father, that adopted me into their hearts when I was young and bitter. I was horribly abused by my birth mother’s second husband, my stepfather.
“But my new, adopted family refused to allow me to feel sorry for myself. They refused to let me see myself as a victim.
“And they were right. When we see ourselves as a victim, we do not push ourselves to do, to be, our very best. We accept our own lame excuses for not rising above our problems. We do not push ourselves to our full potential.”
Tony’s dark, handsome, earnest face exploded in a bright red and white flash of blood and brains.


Chapter 6 – Aftermath



Dani rose in horror, then collapsed into her chair, her scream strangled in her throat. Eta toppled sideways into her husband’s arms.
Dani heard nothing. Everything faded to black.


“Ma’am! Ma’am! Are you alright Ma’am?” The voice came out of foggy darkness.


Someone was shaking her shoulder.


Her chest hurt. Somebody was pumping on her chest. Then covering her mouth with theirs. She gasped twice, then faded back into darkness.


“Good morning, Dani.” A pleasant female voice seemed to come from above her. The voice was not familiar.
Dani opened her eyes. The room was too brightly lit. She squinted, shying sideways as she tried to cover her eyes with her hand. Something was on her hand, keeping her from covering her eyes.
Somebody turned the lights off.
“Welcome back,” the female voice said.
“Where am I,” Dani asked. She didn’t hear her voice. She said it again, but still couldn’t hear her words.
“Just lay still, honey, we’ll help you adjust to sitting if you want us to. Just nod if you want to sit up.”
Dani nodded. Gentle hands slid under her back. Whoever they were helped her to sit.
“Where am I?” she asked again.
Still no sound came from her mouth. She felt pain in her throat.
“You have a tracheotomy, Dani. It will be in place for another day or so. Until then why don’t you write down what you want to say. I’ll remove the drip line that is connected to the back of your hand so it’s easier to move.”
Dani felt as much as saw the tube being removed from the back of her hand. “Thank you,” she tried to say before she remembered that she could not speak.
She took the pen and notebook from the nurse and wrote, “Is my brother OK? Where am I? What happened?”
The nurse took Dani’s hand as she sat down on the bed beside her. “You’re in the hospital. There was an explosion at the graduation ceremony. The FBI tells us it was quite likely a terrorist attack, although no group has taken credit for it. Yet.”
Dani frantically scribbled, “Is Tony OK? What about Eta and Ralph.”
The look on the nurse’s face answered the question. The woman shook her head, grasping both of Dani’s hands. “I’m sorry, Dani. But at least none of them suffered. It happened so fast that the explosion killed everyone in your vicinity. You are the only person that survived. Frankly, we don’t have an explanation for why or how you survived. The explosives experts say it defies explanation.”
Dani’s whole body wracked as she sobbed. She made no sound.
There was a knock on the door to her room. A head peeked around the doorjamb. “Can we come in?”
The nurse looked at Dani with one eyebrow raised in question.
Dani shrugged.
“Come on in,” The nurse said as she walked out of the small room.
A man and a woman walked in. Their faces were full of concern and curiosity.
“Hi. I’m, Ron, Ralph and Eta’s son. We heard about the situation. I wanted to meet you. I have no idea why I never came home to meet you and Tony. I guess it’s just been a very busy time for us. But that’s no excuse. I know that. Now. It’s not until the person that you love dies that you wake up and realize that you don’t have unlimited time. Anyway, I wanted to see if there is anything I can do for you … even though I’ve never met you before. And I am sorry.”
Dani looked up at the man, tears streaming down her cheeks.


Chapter 7 – Recovery


Three Months Later
Dani forced herself to return to college that fall. She spoke at no one; she smiled at no one. For her, there was only determination, focus, goal driven tasks, and resolve. She refused to think of herself as a victim. She would reach her goal. She would be the best soccer player in the world. She would not allow whoever had killed over 300 innocent people in a seemingly senseless attack to interfere with her future. Even now, after months of investigation by the police and the FBI, no one had taken credit for the explosions.
At least once a week she would awaken in terror, having had the same dream; in the dream there was a distinct sequence of events that occurred. First was always Tony’s head exploding. Second was always the bomb going off, and Eta’s falling sideways into Ralph’s arms. Or was she blown sideways into her husband? No matter how hard she tried to decipher the dream, the meaning eluded her.
Every fourth weekend she returned home to visit the graves of her “family”, the only family she acknowledged. Their graves held the only solace she could find.
Intensive soccer practice started late that winter. With daily practice came welcome relief from her studies. She had perfect test scores in every class. Still, it wasn’t enough to heal her heart.
Her soccer coach was a man, perhaps only a few years older than she, but it was impossible to tell by looking. She had yet to catch him looking at what lay below her shoulders. Instead he invariably looked her directly in the eye as he coached her. She didn’t feel threatened by his casual, friendly, but always professional attentions. He did not ask her why she never spoke, which allowed her trust for him to build each week.
And she did well, constantly outperforming anyone else on the team. None of the other players seemed to care if she was friendly to them or not. She was never unfriendly. She passed the ball to whoever was in the right position on the field. In scrimmages, she passed off to a teammate far more often than she shot at the goal.
That changed during the first game. Her teammates seemed to have forgotten everything coach taught them. No one was sprinting ahead toward the other team’s defenders. No one was setting themselves up for her pass to them.
So Dani simply started dribbling the ball around the other team’s players and scoring herself. By half time they were leading 12 to nothing.
Coach scolded the team for not playing as a team. He made the point that the only player that consistently drove for the goal was Dani.
The other players glared at Dani.
Coach noticed, and again scolded them for not getting their butts in position for a pass and score. “Wake up! Get into a position so she can pass forward to you!”
The second half was better. The forwards made a point of sprinting into position. Dani shot the ball to them resulting in three goals by the forwards.
The final score was 15 to zip.
Dani was awarded Best Offensive Player and Most Valuable Player.
While they were dressing after the game, a teammate, Robi asked Dani why she never talked.
Dani shrugged and continued dressing.
Robi didn’t let it drop. “Look, you’re going for a soda with me. I’m buying. I‘m not taking ‘no’ for an answer either. So get your butt dressed and lets go.”
Dani shrugged and finished donning her clothes, which consisted of shorts and a sweatshirt, soccer shoes and bobby socks, and a man’s felt hat.
“How come you wear that hat? Looks like a man’s hat,” Robi asked.
Dani looked at her. “It was my dad’s before he was killed.” Dani burst into tears.


Chapter 8 – A Friend


Connecting
They had no more than walked out into the sunlight when Robi dropped a soccer ball onto the sidewalk then kicked it over to Dani. Dani, without thinking, trapped the ball under her foot, flipped it up to bounce from knee to knee as she walked, then let it drop back to the ground. She trapped it, then tapped it back to Robi.
Neither of them missed a step as they kept the ball in play, chatting with each other as they walked back to the dorm. It felt so good to have someone to talk to again.
“We should room together,” Robi suggested.
Dani looked at her out of the corner of her eye. Robi was smiling to herself, her eyes focused a few yards ahead of where they walked.
Dani’s current dorm room was tiny and dark. ‘Maybe a double room would be better,’ she thought. She shrugged, “Sure, how do we make it happen?”
“I think we just talk to the dorm mother. Her office is on the first floor by the stairs. Want to stop in on the way?”
Dani could feel her heart skip a beat at the thought of having a friend again. The idea was both a little scary and a little exciting.  She shrugged. “OK, sure.”


Dani’s few things fit easily into the larger room. A small laptop, few pairs of jeans, t-shirts, two sweatshirts, a coat, and her sneakers. Her allotted desk was right in front of the window. She could see out into the quad, watch people as they played tennis, or sat about chatting or studying.
“Mmmmm, peaceful,” she purred.
Robi chuckled. “It is, isn’t it?”
Dani unpacked her book bag then plopped down at her desk. The room reminded her of the room that Eta and Ralph had so kindly loaned them. It was bright and airy and comfortable. The sudden memory was warm and fuzzy, but only slightly sad. In a short while, she felt thoroughly at home.


About midnight a knock sounded on their door. “Come in babe,” Robi called.
A boy stuck his head around the door. “You two decent?” he asked, a lopsided grin on his face, his eyes immediately checking out the twins.
“Would it matter?” Robi chortled as she sprang up and ran to him, wrapping her arms around his neck, pressing her body against his. She kissed him for quite some time, then pulled her head back.
She looked at Dani, who had been nervously trying not to look at the two of them doing something she had never experienced. “Mind if he stays over tonight? We promise not to get too rowdy.”
Dani didn’t know what to say. She shrugged, trying to appear blasé about the subject, then turned back to her studies. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t remember a single thing she read. Their soft sounds of kissing and petting made Dani feel as if she were a voyeur, someone that was sneaking into a naughty place she didn’t belong. To make matters worse, she began having physical sensation in her lower tummy; feelings she had never experienced before. Squiggly, inside feelings, down ‘there.’ She tried to squirm a little, perhaps to itch the sensations away. It only made matters worse.
“I’m going to go take a shower,” she said, grabbing her bathing bag and towel. She walked rapidly out of the room.
She became aware that she was breathing hard.
As she undressed in the bathing facility’s dressing room, she heard whispering coming from the shower area. It got louder as she selected a shower booth and stepped inside. She was partially though her ablutions when she heard a moan, a female voice muttered, “Deeper … harder … yes baby. Yes! Right there baby! Yes! Right there! Right there! Right there!”
Dani froze. What in the world were those people doing? Right where? Why did she sound so desperate?
Dani tried to make no noise as she washed herself. When she washed the twins, or her lady parts, the sensations made her feel as if they were quickly getting out of control. She stopped moving her hands so that the sensations would go away. She was breathing hard again.
The other people were still making odd sounds, saying unintelligible things to each other. They sounded frantic, out of control. Suddenly a male voice groaned, “OH FUCK! OH FUCK!”
Then they were silent, except for heavy breathing and a few happy murmurs.
Dani finished her shower, being careful not to touch herself ‘there’. She dried herself, then put her terry bathrobe back on.
As she padded back to her new dorm room, she wondered if the two in the shower had been doing the same thing that Robi and her boyfriend were probably doing. She stopped outside the door to her room and listened. No sounds were audible from inside. She pushed the door open and stepped in. The lights were out, except for one small night-light.
Relieved, she slipped out of her robe and crawled into bed. She thought about what she had heard tonight, and tried to compare it with the sterile teachings during health class years before. Her teacher had presented sex as a boring unfulfilling subject. That certainly didn’t seem to be what the two couples she had heard tonight were experiencing. They seemed to be enjoying it immensely.


Chapter 9 – A Special Friend


The Next Morning
Dani felt her bed wiggle, as the cover rose. Someone slipped in behind her. An arm slid around her waist.
She stiffened. Was it Robi, or was it her boy friend? She didn’t feel anything poking her, not below, and not in her back. A finger began to circle slowly on her tummy. It was gentle, tender, slow.
The person behind her snuggled in a little closer. Now Dani could feel nipples, pointed, pressed against her back. The fullness of breasts.
The finger continued to circle. The circles began to move, slowly, up her tummy, then just as slowly, back down, lower.  And lower.
It circled just above her panties. Then touched them. Lightly.
Then the soft touch again circling upward, toward her heart, toward her mind, toward her breasts. She felt her nipples stiffen. Her tummy muscles began to tense, just like the night before.
Soft lips kissed the base of her neck. Then again, even softer.
Dani remembered some of the sounds she had heard the night before, the sounds of kisses, the murmurs of delight, the wet sounds that she could not place. The grunts and gasps and sounds of heavy breathing. The low moans, obviously Robi’s. Dani wondered what had caused that?
Robi’s hand caressed her shoulder, then pulled her gently onto her back. The girl’s face appeared above Dani’s. Her lips kissed Dani, ever so gently, softly, lovingly. “Your boobs are incredible Dani,” she murmured.
Robi moved her hand up, placing it over Dani’s breast, the center of the palm of her hand pressing against Dani’s nipple.
It felt so good.
Their tummies touched. Robi’s mound pressed against Dani’s. More kisses, kisses on her eyelids, on her ears, on her lips. A flick of her tongue crossed Dani’s lips.
Dani moaned.
The tip of Robi’s tongue slipped inside, touching Dani’s teeth, then her tongue.
Dani felt her thighs part instinctively, moving laterally, then wrapping around Robi’s hips. Her arms went above her head, pressing downward against her sheets. Her chest arched, her eyes closed, she moaned. Her legs captured Robi’s hips, pressing them against her.
“Fuuuuuuuuuuuuck!” filtered across the room.
Startled, Dani looked over toward the source of the sound. Robi’s boyfriend was staring at them, his mouth open, his eyes wide.
Dani erupted from under Robi, landing on her feet, her hands searching frantically for her robe. Robi ended up half on and half off the bed; her eyes out of focus, confusion written in her expression. A sob escaped her lips.


The tension between them that day wore at both of them.
Robi had kicked her boyfriend out of her life.
They could not meet each other’s eyes. They exchanged no words, not even during soccer practice.
Coach watched them both, noting their tense interaction. The strain between them led him to believe that they had fought about something. His experience had taught him that such was the lives of students, especially female students.
He made a mental note to talk to them individually, lest their animosity get in the way of the team comradery that he worked so hard to foster.
After practice, Robi looked at Dani. “I’m so sorry,” she said.
Dani’s eyes teared up. She turned away.
There was no soccer ball passed between them on their way home.
Robi glanced at Dani. “I need to stop in at the store and get some … stuff.”
“Me too,” Dani replied without looking at her.
They both walked directly toward the women’s necessities. Embarrassed, they both scanned the Tampax shelf for their preference.
They both picked the same item.
As they were paying, two football players walked in. “Damn, bro, look at those two broads over there! I bet they need our dicks! Let’s pick ‘em up!”
The person that had spoken put his hand on Robi’s shoulder. “Hey bitch! Let’s go back to my place!”
Dani’s growl was full of menace. “Take your hands off her!  NOW!”
The football player laughed, putting his hand on Dani’s shoulder, intending to shove Dani away.
He was not expecting the broken thumb, or the broken forearm, nor his dislocated knee. But the worst pain was his ruptured testicle.


Chapter 10 – Football


At the end of Practice
Coach looked Robi and Dani in the eye as he jerked his head toward his office. “I need to see you two for a couple of minutes.”
Dani and Robi looked at each other, then headed to the Coach’s office.
Coach pointed at two chairs then sat behind his desk. He looked at them for a few seconds, then said, “Tell me about last night at the drug store.”
Robi spoke first. “Two dudes were getting nasty with me and Dani set them straight.”
Coach nodded, then shifted his gaze to Dani.
Dani looked him directly in the eye. “The guy that was trying to paw Robi was both high and drunk. I could see it in his eyes and smell it on his breath. She was in danger. He was manic and ignored our protest about his actions.”
Coach thought for a few seconds, then picked up his phone. He dialed, waited a few seconds, then said, “Come down here.” A pause, then, “Yeah, my office.” He hung up, then looked back at them. “The football coach is pissed because the guy that was trying to assault you two is one of his star players. Scholarship, the whole thing. He wants to talk.”
There was a knock on the door.
“Come in,” Coach said.
A really fat man waddled in. Before he could even start ranting, Coach said, “Your player was both high and drunk, would not take no for an answer to his inappropriate comments to these two young ladies, and started to manhandle Robi, the girl on the left. I suggest that you back off and listen, not yell.”
The fat man looked taken aback.
Dani looked at him. “Your team’s biggest problem is you don’t have a good place kicker or a point-after kicker. Why don’t you let me do that for you? I’ll be the highest scoring player on your team, the way your team is going this year.”
The fat man turned scarlet.
Coach started laughing.
The fat man wilted into a chair. “Shit!” He said. He looked first at Dani, then at Coach. “Could she do it?” he asked.
“Well, let’s go find out,” was Coach’s grinning response.
They followed the waddling man out of the office, down the hallway, and out onto the field. Several football players were there, rudely shooing the last few soccer players out of their way.
The fat guy retrieved a kicking tee from a bag of equipment and tossed it toward Dani. Dani caught the tee with her foot, letting it drop into place without even touching it with her hand.
The fat guy yelled at one of the football players to throw him a football. The player threw the ball to him, but the fat guy dropped it.
Dani, using only her feet, trapped the ball, then tapped it onto the tee with her toe. She backed up about seven feet, then without preamble kicked the ball right through the center of the uprights. The ball was so perfectly placed that it was centered both vertically and horizontally.
“Sheeeeezus!” the fat guy said, eyes wide. “Do that again!”
Dani flipped the tee up into her hand with her toe, then jogged another thirty yards away from the uprights. She dropped the tee to her toe and placed it on the 65-yard line. She held up her hand for a football.
The fat guy yelled at a player to ‘toss that girl’ a ball.
The player, who Dani recognized as the team’s star quarterback, rifled the ball as hard as he could throw it three feet over Dani’s head. Without apparent effort, she did a backflip, catching the football between her feet, and deposited it perfectly on the tee as she came down. She backed up 7 feet, then, barely looking at the goal posts, kicked another perfect field goal.
Dani held up her hand for another ball.
Coach tried to heave one of the footballs that Dani had kicked through the goal posts, but his throw was about twenty feet short.
Dani jogged to the football, trapped it, then dribbled it toward the quarterback. When she was about ten feet away from him, she kicked it, hard, right into his crotch. The pointed end hit his nards perfectly.
He screamed and went down, hands cupping his injured parts.
“Asshole,” she said as she walked by him, doubled over on the playing field.


Chapter 11 – The Proposal


Back in Coach’s Office
“Have a seat, ladies,” Coach said, waving at empty chairs in front of his desk.
Dani wondered if she had gone too far when she kicked the football into the quarterback’s nuts. She hoped that Robi wouldn’t have to pay a price for her impulsive actions.
Coach saw the look on her face. “No, Dani, don’t worry about me being pissed at you. I thought what you did was right on. The football coach is impressed with your abilities. I told him that you would choose when or if you want to practice with his team. He fought it, a bit, but when I pointed out that you could kick field goals far better than anyone else he’s ever seen, and needed to focus on soccer, he agreed that you could just go to the games. You do need to get fitted for a uniform though.”
Dani nodded, trying not to grin when she remembered the quarterback staring up at her in fear, his balls cupped in his hands.
Coach continued, “I would also like for both of you to consider taking martial arts classes. What do you think?”
Dani looked at Robi.
Robi shrugged.
Dani looked at Coach and shrugged. “When?”


Coach, as it turned out, was Sensei at the Dojo. The girls warmed up, then sparred for a few minutes, Dani teaching Robi what she needed to know.
Coach was shocked at how precise Dani’s skills were. When they took a break, Coach looked at Dani, “Where in the hell have you learned that?”
Dani looked at Coach, surprised by his disbelief. “My younger brother was 6th Dan before he was murdered. I used to tag along.”
“So, which Dan are you?”
“4th,” Dani said, her cheeks blushing in embarrassment.
“Dayam!” Coach said softly.
Robi was having fun with the kata and exercises she was learning.
In the shower, Robi looked at Dani. “You’re really good at this, aren’t you!”
Dani shrugged. “Not as good as my brother was.” She teared up.
Robi moved to stand in front of Dani. She carefully wiped the tears out of Dani’s eyes.  She looked a little scared. “Dani, could we … um … you know … um … make love tonight?”
Dani’s face turned bright red. She studied her feet. “I don’t know anything about that stuff,” she said softly.
Robi giggled. “I’ll teach you that if you’ll teach me how to fight.”
Dani glanced at her new friend. “Really? I mean … I don’t even know how to kiss. Or anything.”
“Even better,” Robi said.


Coach motioned to Dani to join him in his office again. He looked at Robi. I need to talk to Dani alone for a couple of seconds. Could you wait out here?”
Coach closed the door behind Dani as she slipped into a chair.
“What I want to talk to you about is something that must be kept only between you and me. NO ONE ELSE is to know of what I say. Understand?”
Dani stared at Coach. “What’s it about?”
Coach dug into his desk drawer and removed a sheet of paper. He slid it across the desk to Dani. He plopped a pen on top of the paper. “Read this carefully, ask any questions you need to, then when you fully understand what it says, sign it … if you’re willing to abide by what it says.”
Dani picked up the paper and began to read. There was a lot of legal speak, but it seemed to ask her to promise to never divulge anything that she heard, saw, or did in relationship with a certain group called ‘Retri’.


Chapter 12 – Retri


Understood, and Signed
Dani looked at Coach. “What’s Retri?”
Coach grimaced. “Unfortunately I can’t tell you until you have agreed to keep everything I tell you confidential.”
“What if after you tell me, and I have signed this, I realize that I need to talk to someone about it?”
“It would be the wrong thing to do,” Coach replied.
“I don’t like this, so no, I won’t sign it.” She shoved the piece of paper back across the desk.
Coach stared at her for a while. He was clearly disappointed with her decision. He pursed his lips as he contemplated what to say. Finally he took a deep breath.  “Dani, there’s a lot of really bad people in this world. Unless the good guys start being proactive about that, it’s only going to get worse.
“You, young lady, have skills that are better than most I have met in my life. I think that you could be one of the good guys. One of the people that could help us level the playing field. Please think carefully before you decide not to help us.”
Dani watched Coach’s face as he talked. There was a slight tightening in the corner of his eyes that showed how strongly he felt about the subject. She felt tears in her eyes when she said, “Would this help me find out who killed my brother and parents?”
Coach nodded. “That is definitely one of the events that we are working on.”
“Have you made any progress?”
Coach shoved his chin forward, indicating the sheet of paper he needed her to sign.
Dani thought for a few more seconds, then picked up the pen and signed the sheet of paper. She shoved the sheet back toward Coach. “Talk to me.”
Coach did, for over an hour.


When Dani unlocked the door to their room, Robi rushed to her, wrapping her arms around her, holding her close, her head against Dani’s shoulder. “What’s the matter, Robi?” she asked, holding the trembling woman for as long as she needed her to.
“I was so scared!” Robi said.
“About what?” Dani asked.
“I was afraid you were going to get kicked off the team.”
“For what?”
“For what you did to protect me, and how you showed that awful fat coach and his quarterback up.”
Dani giggled as she held Robi. “Everything’s fine, baby. Just fine!” She kissed Robi’s neck. “Don't worry honey, I will not let anything or anyone get in my way of being the best soccer player in the world. Not now, not ever.”
Robi nodded. She felt soothing peace flow through her. “I think I love you, Dani.” She said softly. “Is that OK?”
Dani smiled as she nodded. “Yes baby, but we will love many others during our lives. You understand that, right?”

Robi snuggled closer. “I guess so, but I can’t imagine it right now.”